When It Was Me
by piper maru duchovny
Summary: No, I'm not jealous, no I'm not, I just what everything she's got.


**When It Was Me**

**Summary: I'm not jealous, no I'm not, I just want everything she's got. **

**A/N: I heard 'When It Was Me' by Paula DeAnda on a friend's myspace and my first thought goes 'HOLY CRAP SCULLY!' so, of course I am writing a fic for it!**

**Dedication: To Rachel, cause she's awesome. "Screw the bee, Scully had a cold!" 3**

**Disclaimer: Not Mine (sniffles) torture. pure torture.**

Scully lay on her couch, it had been another rough day at work. It should've been boring, there was no case, just hours of paper work they had been putting off, instead it was eight hours of living hell. Mulder had disappeared a few times before lunch, it was nothing new, she'd figured he'd gone to go bug someone or to visit the boys, who knew? Fox Mulder was a man of many excuses, he could've drawn a mustache on Skinner's face and got away with it.

After lunch, Mulder got up to leave again and she had, had it. Throwing down her pencil, she had looked at him, "Do you have a bladder infection or something?"

"No."

"Then why are you not doing your half of the paper work?" Scully had asked, Mulder's beeper went off and he looked at her apologetically as he ducked out the door. Biting her lip, she called after him, "I'm not doing your half of the paperwork! I'm not!"

She had.

Mulder had never returned to the office and Scully was purely aggravated by the time five o'clock rolled around. She slammed drawers closed, filing stuff quickly, grabbing her belongings, she left the office. Determined, her face reading rage, she wanted to know where her partner was and now. She had found him easily enough, sitting on the edge of Diana Fowley's desk, laughing with her about something. Diana brushed her hand over his thigh and Scully was sure the color of her face matched her hair. Then it happened, Mulder reached out, brushing a fallen lock from Diana's face.

Something in that simple movement undid her, Scully had nearly sprinted from the Hoover Building, through the parking lot and to her car. She had sat for a few minutes fuming, had she read him all wrong? Did she really not know Fox Mulder? She had thought they had been getting closer. They had been having more of their moments, those moments were lasting longer, stringing together. Then Diana Fowley showed up and messed it all up. Tears filled her eyes, turning her car on, she had left work with her radio playing the loudest, angriest music she could find on the radio.

That's how Dana Katherine Scully found herself on the couch, nursing a glass of wine and a broken heart. She sniffled again, keeping the tears at bay, she wasn't going to let them fall for him. How had she lost something she had never really had?

"Of course he likes Diana." Scully whispered to herself, placing her drink on the coffee table, she turned on her side, clutching a pillow to her chest, "She's perfect Dana, she's everything you're not. Legs up to here, chest out to there, confidence, beauty and a history." She buried her head into the pillow, Fox Mulder would never want her, not the way he wanted Diana.

She must've drifted off, because when she opened her eyes, the room was dark. There was a knock at the door and she was too tired to get up. Scully's heart rate quickened when she heard her door knob turn, then she realized whoever it was had a key. Meaning it was either Fox Mulder or her mother, she hoped it wasn't the former. The smell of pizza filled her nose, of course, fate couldn't throw her a bone. She closed her eyes, her breathing even, maybe he'd take a hint and go away.

"Scully.." Mulder said softly, "Scully.. you awake?" He sat on the edge of the coffee table, brushing the hair from her face. Scully fought to keep her breathing even, she faked a cough and turned into his hand. He traced a thumb over her tear stained cheeks, "Oh Scully, I'm sorry." He whispered.

Her heart was yelling at her, 'Open your eyes! Hug the big buffoon! Forgive him!' but her mind took precedence, telling her, 'Fake it. Make him feel like crap'.

Scully lay still, she felt Mulder leave the room, placing the pizza in the fridge. She felt him come back. She heard him scribbling her a note on a napkin, placing it on the coffee table. He pressed a kiss to her temple, "I'm sorry Scully."

She bit her lip, 'WAKE UP!' her heart screamed and this time she listened.

"Mulder?" She faked a yawn and her eyes fluttered open.

"Scu..Scully.. I.." Mulder stumbled over his words, "Pizza.. fridge."

"Oh.. sorry I was taking a nap." Scully explained, stretching. Her hair felt into her face, messy and frizzy from being slept on. She had dried drool on her chin, her shirt was all wrinkled and her make up had run from crying, she was certain she looked like a complete mess.

"I should go.." Mulder turned.

"You brought Pizza?" Scully asked, straightening her shirt.

"Yeah.." Mulder turned back to face her.

"Get the food. I'll change." Scully said, she wanted to be angry, but the look on her face melted her heart.

"Why are you going to change?" Mulder asked, the man was clueless.

"I look like crap."

"You look beautiful." Mulder said softly.

"You lie." Scully shot back.

"I do not." Mulder replied.

"I'm gonna go change." Scully stood, padding down the hall to her room. She grabbed her pajamas, she didn't have the energy to dress up for him. She pulled on a pair of blue plaid pajama pants and an over sized black shirt. She entered the bathroom, washing her face and brushing her teeth. She pulled her hair up in a small ponytail.

When she reentered the room, Mulder had the pizza box open on the table and his note was long gone. "Hey." She sat next to him, tucking her legs under her as she grabbed a slice.

"Hey." Mulder gave a small smiled, Scully noted he had lost his tie and his jacket. His shoes were tucked under the table next to hers.

"So what'd Diana want?" Scully asked.

"Way to jump right into it." Mulder finished his slice of pizza, grabbing another.

"I am the Queen of the Non-Sequiters." Scully explained, "Now tell me, what was so important that you ditched me."

"I did not ditch you! I was in the building the whole day!" Mulder responded.

"I had to do your paper work and you were working with another agent. If you look in the dictionary there is a picture of your face next to the term ditching." Scully glared at him.

"Fair enough." Mulder ran a hand over his face, "She had some information."

"About?" Scully prodded.

"Stuff."

"What stuff?"

"Stuff."

"Samantha?"

"Is that your default guess?"

"Is that what it was?"

"No"

"Then what was it?"

"YOU." He snapped and Scully's protest caught in her throat, she tossed her crust in the box, wiping her hands on her pants, she turned to look at him.

"I beg your pardon?" Scully asked, a hand over her heart.

"She said she had some information about you." Mulder explained.

"Regarding?" Scully asked, her eyebrow raised.

Mulder patted the back of his neck and Scully filled in the blanks, tilting her head to the side, "Mulder I'm fine."

"Scully, you always say you're fine." Mulder had her there.

"Well I am this time. My last scan came out fine. I haven't had anything weird happening."

"Well.. I just, I wanted to be sure."

"Is there something I should know?" Scully asked, worried.

"No. I checked it out." Mulder explained, "No immediate danger."

"Then why didn't you just tell me?" Scully asked, aggravated again.

"Cause, I didn't want to worry you!" Mulder defended himself.

"So you just wanted me to get pissed off instead!?" Scully yelled.

"Why are you so mad?" Mulder asked.

"I SAW YOU TWO IN HER OFFICE!" Scully yelled, tears pooling in her eyes.

"What are you talking about?" Mulder was clearly lost.

"Her office. Her hand on your leg, your hand brushing the hair from her face! That's a pretty intimate moment with an informant!" Scully's hands formed fists, her nails digging into her palms, trying to keep her calm.

"She's my friend!"

"She's also your ex." Scully shot back.

"Are you jealous?" Mulder's face showed enlightenment.

"No." Scully protested weakly.

"Holy crap, you're jealous." Mulder's jaw slacked.

"Of course I am jealous!" Scully shot back.

"Why!?"

"Can you be more dense?"

"Apparently..."

"She's everything I'm not Mulder. And I can't really fault you for liking her. I mean, I am assuming if I was a guy, being wanted by a tall, leggy, big chested brunette would be construed as a good thing." Scully rambled, "I mean, tall, leggy, big chested brunette verses short, band-aids for bras, red heads, well it doesn't take a genius to know who will win that one."

"Yeah. The red head." Mulder mumbled.

"What?" Scully's heart stopped.

"If there is a game to be won, you're the winner." Mulder stood up, holding her wrists to stop her from pacing. She looked at her feet, when had she started pacing?

"What?" Scully asked, her heart pounding so loudly that she was sure Mulder could hear it.

"You. Not Diana. Diana has never held a candle to you."

"Mulder, don't b.s. me."

"I'm not."

"Me?" Scully asked, unable to believe it.

"You." Mulder lowered his head, kissing her slowly. His hands trailed down her wrists, linking fingers with her. The kiss was tentative, yet passionate. Full of emotion, yet reserved. It was everything it should've been and more. Mulder pulled away and looked her in the eye.

"What was that?" Scully gasped for air.

"A kiss.. as far as I know." Mulder whispered.

"You kissed me."

"I did."

"I haven't hit you yet."

"I know, I'm surprised too." Mulder quipped as Scully's hand connected with his shoulder.

"There. That's more normal."

"So what are the odds I'd get really hit, if I kissed you again?" Mulder asked.

"Slim." Scully said, "I'd say your shots are pretty good."

"Good." Mulder kissed her again, this time more slowly. They stood that way for awhile, kissing in the middle of Dana Scully's living room, their pizza growing cold, the sky growing dark outside.

Their lips separated with a pop, Scully drew her lower lip between her teeth, her arms locked around Mulder's neck, she looked up at him. He pressed a kiss to her nose, "I think I like this."

"Me too." Mulder whispered, his lips pressed against her forehead.

Her arms slid from his neck and found their way around his waist, burying herself in his warmth, "What now?"

"We sit?" Mulder took her hand and lead her over to the couch. She sat next to him and he wrapped an arm around her shoulder, pulling her to his side. She smiled and leaned into him.

"And now?"

"We watch TV." Mulder grabbed the remote.

"I'm deciding." Scully reached for the remote.

"What's the magic word?" Mulder asked, placing the remote behind his back.

"Please?"

"Actually it was antidisestablishmentarianism, but you were close enough." Mulder teased, handing her the remote.

"Thank you for giving me the remote in my own apartment."

"You're welcome." Mulder replied as she turned the TV on. Mulder wrapped an arm around her shoulder and she leaned into his side. She settled on Nick at Nite, "The Facts Of Life, really?"

"I always wanted to be Jo." Scully explained, leaning into his side, her head resting against his shoulder.

"Really? I see you more as a Blair." Scully elbowed him in the ribs.

"Melissa was Blair, we fought like Jo and Blair." Scully chuckled at the memory.

Mulder pressed a kiss to her temple, "Could I be George Clooney?"

"As the repair man? Absolutely."

"I think I am supposed to be offended by that." Mulder laughed lightly.

"I meant it in the best way possible." Scully said, her feet tucked under her, Mulder pulled the blanket from the back of the couch over her.

"I'm glad." Mulder replied and they sat in silence, watching the antics of the teenage girls on screen. It didn't take long for Scully to drift off, Mulder's arm was numb, but he didn't want to move it. Watching her sleep was worth the tingling sensation. When he could no longer feel his arm, he turned the TV off, shifting ever so slightly, so they could both lay on the couch, Scully's leg propped up over his, her head on his chest and his arms wrapped around her waist. Mulder fought hard to stay awake, to watch her sleep, not wanting the moment to end, but his eyes fluttered close.

--

A week later, Diana Fowley died in a tragically in a freak accident. Ran over by a car full of clowns.

**A/N: That's right I took it there. ;] Rachel's only suggestion was that I have Diana get hit by a bus, now I'm not that mean. LOL ;]**


End file.
